It is a well known fact that men orgasm much faster and more regularly than women. Most men believe that it is hard to make a girl orgasm. Sad, but true. A study done recently showed that most men orgasm within the first two minutes of genital intercourse and only about one third of women actually orgasm at all during sex. Disheartening? It should be! However, if you know what to do and how to do it you will make her orgasm whenever you like! Now there’s a way to impress a girl!
Now lets get a few things straight. Sex is the ultimate way of connecting with someone, and should be treated as such. Women should be treated with care and respect, no matter how ‘animalistic’ sex can become. Also, you should begin to see sex as a way of pleasing each other, rather than getting yourself off. See your whole body as a tool for pleasing your lady, and you will reap the rewards of a fantastic sex life. Forget everything you have seen in porn movies. In fact, it is my opinion that watching porn can severely damage the way a man sees sex. It does not depict natural interactions and teaches men from an early age how not to behave in bed. It also desensitises you to the specialness of sex and can actually lead to dissatisfaction in the bedroom. Food for thought gentlemen.
So, lets begin. Firstly it is crucial to get a girl in the mood. A friend once told me that he likes to begin to build sexual tension during dinner in a restaurant. He drops hints as to what he would like to do to her later, and when dessert comes around he would take the opportunity to be as flirtatious as possible. You can imagine what happened when they finally got home. She was so hot she practically threw him onto the bed and tore off his clothes. The lesson behind this little story is to show you that women need warming up. Of course there are times when she will just get the urge right then, but generally speaking if sex is on the cards (and hey even if it wasn’t) then slowly building it up is a sure fire way of getting a girl turned on. She must be comfortable with you and your interaction should involve a lot of touching. Playfulness is a great way to get a girl to like you. Be playful and joke with her, stop walking suddenly and passionately kiss her and hold her like you will later on, then kiss her sweetly, look her in the eyes for moment and keep walking hand in hand. These are just a few tips that work wonders for me, but feel free to make your own up. Creativity goes a long way in this ‘step’.
I would just like to quickly say here that the use of the word ‘step’ should be read with the understanding that it is actually one big thing, not a step one, step two, step three thing. I use the ‘step’ guide to show you that there are stages to building her up and the real trick is to move through them slowly its like tracking slowly up a roller coaster with the express purpose of rushing down the other side in a wave of excitement.
After flirting and making playful suggestions you will find yourself kissing her. This is not a time to start wandering with your hands. Focus on the kiss. Kiss her like you never want to stop. Explore her mouth lightly with your tongue to give her a taste of what you will be doing later somewhere else. Kiss her neck, a very sensitive part of a woman’s body, and her ears. Be careful of kissing her neck too lightly or too heavily. Too lightly will tickle her, and although it is sometimes fun, it can turn her off if done too much. A firm tongue (watch the sloppiness) moved in circles in various places is in my experience the way to go. Take note of where she like it. You will know when she does. When kissing her ears lightly lick in and around with a poked tongue, and flick the tip into the middle of her ear. Not too much as this can be a super sensitive area. While there whisper something tantalizing in her ear. The power of a mans voice is well underutilized in this world. During this interaction it is fine to explore her body and if you feel so inclined and she is susceptible you may let your hands wander. However, don’t stick your hands down her pants just yet. If she wants it, make her wait a little. It won’t be long until your both in bed.
Now you are in bed and your hands are exploring each other much more passionately. The kissing has become stronger even fierce, and you are taking each others clothes off. But hold on buster. Take a moment. If she wants to undress you, that’s fine. But when you undress her take your time to kiss and touch the newly exposed places on her body. Slip her bra off her shoulders and kiss them. Undo the strap and run your fingers down her back. Let the bra fall and kiss her breasts all over. Kiss her lips again and press your chest against hers, moving slightly to arouse her. It is interesting to state here that studies have shown that over 90% of women reach orgasm when their partner spends 20 or so minutes on foreplay before oral sex or intercourse.
So now you are naked and really heated up. Here is how to go about making her orgasm. After kissing her lips, neck and ears for a while it time to move o the breasts. Start by kissing and licking around her breasts. Avoid the nipple to begin with. Really enjoy kissing and licking her here, as she will enjoy it more than you can imagine. The breasts contain nerve endings that are directly connected to the clitoris, which is why it common to see a girl involuntarily massage her own breasts when you are giving a girl oral sex. Now lick around the nipple with your tongue and feel it get hard. Use your hand to keep the other breast stimulated and lightly ‘roll’ the other nipple at the same time. Note I said lightly. Some women do like it harder, you just have to find out, or ask her.
Now the stomach. Kiss it a few times and move on. Seriously. I know a good stomach is like a red flag to a bull for some guys, but it contains little nerve endings for sexual pleasure. Don’t ignore it though. Use it as a ‘I’m getting closer’ moment.
Ok, now we are down there. Our kissing should move from the stomach around her vulva and onto her inner thighs. Yes she might be moaning and sighing and it is so tempting to just jump straight in, but you will only be creating more work for yourself. Think of this entire process as making the oral sex an absolute highlight. Women’s minds are so connected to whether or not they orgasm. If you jump straight into oral sex you will be doing it until she has sufficiently warmed up mentally as well and you will just frustrate her and yourself. So spend some time kissing and licking her inner thighs, and when moving from one to the other give a quick kiss to her vulva and lightly breath your hot breath on her. (note: never breathe INTO a woman, it can be dangerous)
So now she is super charged and you are beginning to give her oral sex. Use a wide flat tongue to begin with, Licking her entire vulva. Explore her entire vulva, outer and inner labia, and around the clitoris. Do not yet touch the clitoris though. The key is build up. French kiss her vulva and really use your tongue to explore her. Slowly flick your tongue inside her and around the opening to her vagina. Spend a little time on each area, and then move on. If she is really getting hot then you can move onto the clitoral area.
A woman’s clitoris is very sensitive. Be careful of stimulating it too much. The best advise I can give you is to use your tongue in a sweeping motion just above the clitoris over the clitoral shaft. It should feel like a hard little tube connecting the head of the clitoris and going under the clitoral hood. This part is very sensitive and feels great to a woman. After a time use your tongue to circle the clitoris directly. By moving your tongue in a circular motion you stimulate the clitoris and the surrounding area. Keep stimulating this area and vary your tongue movements. Around, up, down and across. Flicking faster the more she moans.
If you want to add to her orgasm you could gently use your finger to stimulate the first inch of her vaginal canal and her inner labia. Her G-Spot is a short way into her vagina on the front wall. Think behind the clitoris. To stimulate this coin sized are gently insert your middle or index finger and make a ‘come here’ motion on this area. By doing this you can give her a ‘double’ orgasm. I know it sucks guys, but girls get to have double and multiple orgasms.
When her clitoris begins to retreat under the hood she is nearly there. If you can’t tell whats going on then just keep doing what you are doing and she eventually will orgasm. If you can tell you have a choice. You can keep going and make her orgasm or you can quickly engage in genital intercourse and have the satisfaction of making her orgasm while you are inside her. It is really up to you, or her!